#5 Sunday

She was a little lost, but that’s the way she liked it

No maps to force her down a path she wasn’t ready to travel.

Open hearted; no thing as too much

Her heart was her compass, her only guide.

It was time to turn her cant’s into cans and her dreams into plans..

She was finally ready to trust that she could find happiness on her own,

To trust the magic of new beginnings..

 

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#4 Creative dreams

“The arts are not a way to make a living, they are a very human way of making life more bearable. Practising an art, no matter how well or badly is a way to make your soul grow. For heavens sake, sing in the shower, dance to the radio, tell stories, write a poem to a friend, even a lousy poem. Do it as well as you possible can, you will get an enormous reward. You will have created something”.  -Kurt Vonnegut, A Man Without a Country.

I’ve had that quote saved for quite a while as it really resonates with me. Over the past month I’ve made a conscious effort to focus on allowing my creative spark to flourish, and quite honestly It’s left me feeling inspired and alive. It’s been so fulfilling to spend money on experiences that bring me joy, rather than materialistics.

Recently I’ve been to a jazz night, numerous art exhibitions, musicals, spent time singing and joined a theatre company.

When i’ve watched these shows i’ve sat in admiration of the performers giving it their all. You can see they’re doing what they love, and they’re pursuing a life of passion. 

There was a Brazilian guitarist and singer I passed busking one evening, and I don’t think they realised the difference they were making to peoples routinely walks. I saw people taking out their headphones, smiling in full appreciation. I had to double take and stop in my tracks, eagerly awaiting to hear the next verse. My point is, creativity can pass on happiness..

Personally I believe everyone has a creative spark. It just needs to be explored and then cultivated. For me, creativity is a platform for my imagination to run free and evokes feelings of joy. It’s easy to convince yourself there isn’t enough time outside of your 9-5, but an hour isn’t so hard to find.

To be pretty honest, I had been denying myself my path of creativity (performing), I’d unknowingly been caught up living in fear. Something that’s crept up and seamlessly taken up a negative space in mind. However, after reading the Alchemist (and many other hippy self help books) along with a lot of love and support from those closest to me, I’ve finally snapped out of the cycle and I’ve got the courage to pursue what my soul craves. 

Surround yourself with the dreamers and doers, the believers and thinkers, but most of all surround yourself with those who see greatness within you, even when you don’t see it yourself…-Edmund Lee

Who knows where my path will lead me, but since changing my mindset and deciding I’m going to abundantly chase my dreams, all these little things/kind people have been gravitating towards me.

Truly I believe the universe conspires to give you what you wish for once you channel those energies. I’m aware I sound rather fairy like, and of course I’m only at the beginning of my journey. However, I’m realising that patience (my biggest challenge), a positive mindset and persistence are key variables.

Let the journey of dreams and fulfillment begin…(excited face!)

She believed she could, so she did…-R.S. Grey

#2 Train Travels…

I really adore long train journeys; being transported through towns, cities and villages. All the while wondering what their stories are.

Americano In hand, my favourite journal and ‘The power of now’- a guide to spiritual enlightenment and I’m ready to go.

No doubt I’ll read three pages of Eckhart Tolle and get distracted whilst bobbing along to my favourite songs.

I’m all relaxed and pondering whilst gazing out the window. This time of year is particularly pretty, seeing all the trees in their autumnal glory.

Sparkly eyed and feeling appreciative of  the endless fields of cattle grazing, fluorescent yellow rapeseed flowers and fluffy little lambs. Unfortunately I’m then overwhelmed with guilt of enjoying lamb burgers with mint sauce and fries.

The train’s racing against little cars on their winding roads and next we’re flying under bridges and over rivers. I look to my right and there’s a lake glistening in all it’s glory as the sun beams down through the grey clouds.

Just when I’m in awe of the highlands and endless greenery I’m at the next stop…       A city with a castle and birds soaring above.

There are fragments of joy to be found when unplugging and feeling unreachable. I’m in my own undisturbed  little world journaling away with my thoughts.                             -Of course this isn’t always the case when on the train, sometimes your seated alongside a snorer. Not so ideal!

It’s fun to just breakaway for a week end and  the monotony of routine. It’s important to allow yourself to appreciate new surroundings and explore.

Granted it’s a little more difficult to tap into my little world daily  when rushing for my  routinely 7.57am train, I’m usually suffering with armpits above my 5ft 1 self.

It’s easy to feel a little trapped when rushing around in the rat race, but I feel a sense of free spiritedness when travelling some place new, a  feeling of freedom.

…Now I’m people watching, another hobby I’m pretty great at. I’m hearing different accents from people of all backgrounds, but at this present moment we’re all heading to the same place. All these people from different places are just reminding me how I’m a teeny tiny person in big world  with big dreams.

There’s a little four year old, messy pig tailed and dressed in pink, occasionally she peers over at me scribbling away and shares a little partially toothed smile. And then there’s a guy dressed in his comfies having a one man party with his dre beats, of course he’s completely oblivious of the prosecco fuelled hen party behind him.

We’re all on the same train sharing the same destination with different journeys.

Another three and half hours to go and the grey clouds are slowly disspearing much to my surprise. I’m not complaining however, there’s still so much to see out of this little window.

More greenery, luscious landscapes and an ever changing sky. The sky is always my favourite thing.

Happiness sure is fleeting, so I try and seek it in the smallest of things.

Excuse me for finishing with a slice of super-extra-mature-cathedral-city-cheese, but life really is all about the journey and not the destination.

Tartan scarf at the ready, a heart of excitement and already feeling cold…

Hello Edinburgh, nice to meet you!